How To Edition: Muscling A Tile Floor And Owning It.

Ok, the post says muscling.  It's a lie. Ok, it's not a lie because I would never lie to you; so it's a fib, kinda. But this kinda fib is more of an all encompassing kinda fib rather than a blunt, intentional kinda fib. This is due to the fact that an individual does in fact need to muscle a tile floor to own it - like wresting a crocodile - which of course I do in my spare time in order to compare experiences and write about it here. (did you get that blunt intentional fib?) In addition to needing muscle to completely destroy ones five-layer kitchen floor, you may also need a few other handy dandy tools.  Make sure to grab: a sledge hammer, a bigger sledge hammer, two different sized wrecking bars, two hammers, protective safety wear, a broom, a dad, an Ed, an angry voice and full functional voice box, and a tad of patience & perseverance.  Check?  Good, let's get started.


First, one must assess the floor in question and make your best determination on how many layers you have; this will determine how many ‘Oh Hell No(s)’ you declare.  In our case it was five layers, which ultimately led to umpteen ‘Oh Hell No(s)’ and a few other ‘OMG’s this is going to be a bitch’ exclamations and head shakes.

*Ed gives us his best "Oh, hell no!" face.*

Once we’ve established how much work you’re in for, grab your protective gear because, honey, you’re going into battle. A sledgehammer and muscles are next on your to-grab list. Pick a spot to begin and bring that sledge down as hard as you can on to that ceramic tile obliterating it. My dad was awesome at this. His inner animal came out and he was swinging that hammer like his life was on the line. I was using the smaller sledge and a wrecking bar getting underneath the layers and pry upwards.

At this point expect some pain, sweat, and foul language (not in that order) and also expect to begin finding and subsequently shaking your head at what the previous owners did to ‘fix’ issues they came upon. Example: use a Smirnoff bottle cap to plug a hole in the original sub floor, but make sure you flatten it and hide it under 5 layers of tile and secondary sub floor. I kid you not, this really happened and I have proof (no pun intended). 

Just keep swinging and destructing the entire floor until it’s to the point of satisfaction to you and your co-crocodile wrestlers. The dismantling of the sub floor took a lot of muscle, grunting and sailor speak. Ed actually cut his left index finger while wearing gloves (trying to be like his sister maybe?). It was a bleeder and couldn’t tell if it was going to need a stitch or two until it stopped bleeding a little – it was ok and we butterflied it and got back to work.

After two days of working on wrestling this floor, it was done. All that was left were nails every 6” from the sub floor and old asbestos laminate tiles (almost identical to the tile that was in the basement). We decided to leave the asbestos tiles because we plan on putting down a new floor anyway. Plus, trying to get those suckers up was going to be almost impossible and time consuming. No thank you very much you can keep it.

Now that the floor is up, let's touch on a few other items we accomplished. We played in the mud. Ok, we dabbled in the holy sheet!rock mud and mudded up some of the kitchen - including patches, but ran out of 1/2" holy sheet!rock for the ceiling and have to get more.  I put a second coat of paint on the rec room floor and it looks so much better.  It still needs one more coat, but having a roller on a steek (ever seen Jeff Dunham with Jose Jalapeno on a steek? No?! So funny, gotta watch it. See, I'm a good friend. I even supplied you with a video. You can thank me later after you're done laughing.)

Ok, anyway, I found a roller I could attach to a steek and it made my life a gabillion times easier and holy sheet! the time spent painting that vexing floor was cut in half.  Yay for rollers on a steek.  Another task we began to tackle was patching the hallway where the closet used to be. Considering the numerous coats of hideously ugly semi gloss paint on the walls, it's going to be another adventure.  I LOVE that hallway without the closet.  I'll love it more when its flush and smooth and its painted a glorious shade of pink. Are you scared? hee hee hee.  

On The Slow Boat To Blogsville.

(One week late. I know and I blame Ed. He took the camera for the week. Whats a blog post with no pictures?) 
*I want to wish my awesome father-in-law a BIG FAT get well soon!  He isn't allowed to be broken!  He has work to do at the house!! Even if it is just lifting a paint brush. All kidding aside, I really do hope he feels better soon. Being broken is no fun. Love you, Pa!!*


Three day weekends always offer up plethora of progress and this Independence Day was no different.  I'll tell you what though, I don't know about the guys, but I was dreaming of the beach while sitting on the rec room floor screwing with paint.  It's been so long since I've seen a beach.  What?! Hawaii was pretty much 8 months ago.  For some of us ocean lovers, that time frame is ridiculous and completely unacceptable.  Plus, I broke two nails.  See? I told you the beach far surpasses paint and sheetrock. 

So, what did we get done this past weekend?  Let's see: 

• Paint in the rec room/basement including: fireplace, paneling (yuck), trim, and floor. 
• MORE electric in the kitchen. This way we can now have a microwave and not blow a circuit every time we want to use it. 
• Finished sheetrocking in the bathroom. Covered stuff-a-whole-fam-damly-in-it sized cubby and took out fan/heater/light combo switch.
• Taping and mudding of joints in said bathroom (what a crap job). 
• Installed insulation and vapor barrier in the kitchen on the walls and installed missing insulation in the ceiling.
• Installed 50% of sheetrock in the kitchen thank you Adam, Dad and Ed!). 
• Purchased the overpriced microwave we wanted to match our stove.  (Deal and story forthcoming.) 

Side note: I am going to take a wild gander at how many of you reading this are probably yelling/glaring/or WTF-ing your computer right now, swearing to never read another post or give another damn about numero nine because there are no pictures.  Ha! I know I'm right on this one - especially my over-the-ocean buddies.  Hi Kate & P and Mar & Tyler!  No pictures for you four because you’re perpetually on a beach or oceanfront; so I’m withholding out of pure jealousy. Ok, fine. I'll put pictures in.

The microwave incident was definitely an 'Are you kidding me, kid? Treat your elders with respect and do your customer service job, idiot' moment.  You see Lowe's was having a sale only until the 4th and the microwave we wanted was 379 dollars too much. I went on ebates to see what Lowe's cash back was for the holiday - 4%.  Lower than the 5% last time, but decent.  So I check their appliance sale and BINGO! The microwave we've been pining after for a mere $249.  Ha! Suck on that big box stores!  So, I click buy now and it's ours.  I used Lowe's pick-up at store in 20 minutes guarantee and head on up.  Ed went to get more outlets for the kitchen and I went to get the microwave, but they didn't have it.  So, while speaking to the young (I mean maybe 5 years older than cman) man, I ask when I can get said in-stock-no-we-are-just-kidding microwave.  He said I had two options: 1.) Get a refund and buy next week when they're in-stock again, NOT honoring the $249 or 2.) DRIVE to Middletown or Kingston (both 40min each way away) to get one. Um, hello? Is this thing on? Exsqueeze me, kid?? I beg your potatoes? Don't make me sick my extremely nasty, snarling, blood-thirsty, kid-eating Mama on you. I then spoke to the manager and after 20 minutes(!!!) we finally agreed to just order the damn thing for next Monday honoring my online in-stock (sike!) price.  When I go on Monday to get it, I'm asking for additional discounts. Not because of any other reason than junior’s attitude towards me; I am now an elder. R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it mean to me. So there. Ha. Well, after an extra coupon and cash back I got the $379 microwave for $259 after tax.  Not bad!  Savings of $120. 

This whole week Ed is away in Long Island makin’ bacon to bring home (not literally, although I do love me some bacon) and my dad and I will be back up at the house finishing up some lingering projects – like the bathroom and rec room floor. That floor vexes me. I hate it. Maybe that will be my procrastination project where I just keep saying ‘it needs another week to dry’. However, I do have to say that the amount of white paint applied in the rec room has most definitely brightened up the room exponentially.

  

We had plans to take up the kitchen floor any way, but we found that now it is absolutely necessary and we HAVE to.  First of all, the freakin' floor sits an entire 1/2" higher than the rest of the hardwood floors it meets.  When we explored the 1/2" mountain of flooring, we found 5 layers - yes, 5!!!! layers!!! of flooring including the present ugly red tile.  We found the original laminate tile that was almost identical to the original tile on the rec rom floor.  Then there is another thin wood subfloor. Then red laminate peel-and-stick 'tile'. Then white hearts-and-flowers-make-me-wanna-vomit 'tile'. Then there is the current red ceramic tile - and that tile is thick.  This is going to be a bitch to take up.  I am bringin' my muscles for this one.

 Check out the kitchen ceiling and wall!!  Do you see what I see? Holy Sheet!! We have beautiful white walls!! Ok, they aren't THAT beautiful, but they sure as all hell-o are lookin' better than insulation and vapor barrier and 10000% better than being naked. I absolutely cannot wait to do before and after pictures. I am willing to put money drywall screws on the fact that you won't recognize this house when we are done.

The bathroom. Look at that bathroom! It's. So. Close. I don't want to give away our plans for this room, but I am psyched for the hybrid modern/sleek/a little traditional look we have planned. No, I won't share. Maybe another clue in another week or two. Maybe. 

 So, that's this edition of wreck your house and try to put it back together in only 2-3 months.  Stay tuned for another update - this one on time.  Off to flex my muscles and curse the rec room floor.  At least I don't have to sand the mud in the bathroom. I already called shotgun on NOT doing that ... Ed lost. Wah-wah.

Dude, Man, We Got Pot(s).

Before you call the DEA on me, I'm not talking the green leafy variety, however, you still can light up the type I'm talking and yes, they're high, but will not get you high - blind maybe, but not high.  Sorry, kids.  This past weekend boasted a lot of progress and a shit ton of hours spent at humble casa numero nueve.

I am over the concrete floor in the basement.  OVER. IT. DONEZO. My back, quads, and I will joyfully rejoice when that floor is done.  I may even higher a baptist church choir to come and sing when its final minutes of drying time are complete.  Could you imagine?  A baptist church choir in our basement rejoicing a concrete floor.  Man, wouldn't the neighbors be impressed??  Or they may just call the cops... Anyway, back to the floor.  After I tore up the faux(pas) floor, then the tile, then bean-e-doo'd the crap out of the nasty mastic, then simple green scrubbed it, then let it dry for a week, THEN this weekend I acid etched the floor to ready it for its finishing phase.  Let me tell you, that acid etching stuff is straight out of a cartoon where the bad guy is trying to dunk the good guy into a vat of bubbling acid to strip him of his powers. They're freakin' sharks with laser beams attached to their freakin' heads. Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!  (Austin Powers reference. No? Do I hear crickets?)  I had to armor myself with acid proof gloves on my hands and feet, hence the weird looking feet fingers.  They look like Mickey on crack.  I'm classy.  

*a cleaned, etched, read-to-paint floor. glorious!*

Dad and Adam worked on the pot recessed lights in the kitchen.  We were originally going to have 6 total, but 5 (even though that's an odd number and throws the symmetry off - it gets me every time!!) was the magic number.  We decided on 5 pot lights because 6 pot lights turned into being more like a jersey shore tanning bed than a kitchen.  The wiring was ridiculous.  It was a cluster fudge.  It was an all around fire hazard and how the house didn't burn down before we got to it is beyond me.  You think I'm kidding?  Ask Will and my Dad.  Disastrous.

*look! pot(s)*

Meanwhile...back at the ranch. Oh wait. We are at the ranch. Whatever.  Ed sheet rocked the bathroom.  Dudes and dudettes, that bathroom looks like a room again and it's beautiful.  Ok, not as beautiful as it will be someday, but it's far more beautiful than it was.  Next up is some tile work and getting Ed to begin building that gorgeous vanity.  Oooohhh ... I just gave a hint away....do-da, do-da. (sorry I didn't take any pictures of the sheet rocked goodness. I guess I was THAT tired.)


The very last project of the weekend was completed Sunday night at about 8:30pm.  It was a long-ass day.  Hell, it was a long-ass weekend!  We can see on the back deck at night.  Can you believe it?  Me either!  It was so dark out there due to the lack of peeps with lights in our immediate vicinity (just how we like it!) that we needed lights.  The kitchen wall is naked. Oh la la!  It needs insulation and vapor barrier, but before we could do that the wiring had to be completed.  Annnnd being the complete pain in the ass that I am, I wanted  requested two lights out on the deck.  Well, fast forward to the siding issue and let's just say Ed got mad.  Anyone who knows Ed knows he doesn't really get mad.  He frisbee'd a siding tile so far into the woods with such vengeance he almost took me out and the neighbors truck.  Of course he did so outta frustration and I'm happy to say he got it right and we have happy a tile, a happy Ed and a happy glowing light.  All is good in the world.

*new switch that wasn't there before. my dad is crafty*

So, friends, pals, chums, mates until this (3 day) weekend ... cheers.  

This is the Part Where We Get Disgusting.

Last weekend I demonstrated and shared my (and Mandy's) impeccable destruction abilities and my mastermind plan with the super hero bean-e-doo.  The mastic adhesive that was left over on the floor from the faux(pas) tiles was thick in some places and directly adhered to the concrete we wanted access to.  No Bueno, Amigos!  We want a cleaaaaannnn concrete floor; not a jacked up with black crap concrete floor.  So, Friday night Ed and I went to the house to do some work before our oldness set in and our bedtime rolled around.  Ed finished up the plumbing in the bathroom (which has come quite a ways, btw)  and I became acquainted with the super bean in a 5gallon bucket.  I spread the super bean all over the mastic covered floor and actually heard the concrete sigh a sigh of relief -- like it was thanking me for saving it.

 

Looks like an ice rink, doesn't it?  

So, the super bean was left over night to work its super hero work and flex its super hero muscles while fighting the evil mastic that's trying to take over the concrete floor (insert evil laugh here).  On Saturday morning Ed and I headed back to the house to check on mastic fighting super bean.  The super bean flexed its muscles all night and it was exhausted.  So, I grabbed my new squeegee and started jumped right into the super hero action cleaning up the defeated mastic.  High-Five!  I squeegee'd the old-motor-oil-like-mastic into piles and then put Oil-Dry on the piles to soak up the grossness.  

After HOURS and HOURS of clean-up - I'm talkin' scraping up Oil-Dry, shoveling, more squeegee-ing, Simple Green scrubbing, vacumning, more scrubbing, more vacumning, etc. - it was clean.  I have to say, after all of this work (this room is huge) I was a hurtin' pup (much like someone else we all know) and I was FILTHY and DISGUSTING.  So, want to see what the room looks like naked??  Drum roll please ......

Do you see what I see?!  The picture doesn't show a completely dry floor, but it's 85% dry.  Do you see how gross my feet are?  The top half of me and me fingernails weren't much better.  I went upstairs to see what trouble Ed was getting into and he had done a sheet-ton of work!  Get it?  Sheet rock? Shit-ton?  Ha ha. I'm so clever.  Anyway, Ed finished cement boarding the shower and put up one wall of green mold resistant sheet rock on the window side wall of the bathroom.  

I am excited.  We were both too exhausted to rock the other walls, but a few nights this week will take care of those other walls.  This weekend proved to be a very productive weekend.  We have a 100% set in stone plan for the basement floor that is rad.  The bathroom will be taking shape quite nicely in the next two weeks.  Then, it's on to the kitchen. Oh, the kitchen.  

We Lift Things Up and Put Them Down.

Ed and I spent the entire weekend at the house working away and also working on our muscles.  As a matter of fact, don't be surprised if you come to the house you hear Ed and I speaking something like this:

Since we have bid our hasta la-bye-byes to the furnace, we have to do a lot all of the contractor work our awesome sauce contractor, Tom, was supposed to be doing (well, besides refinishing the hardwood floors and plumbing).  This has it's pros and cons.  Pros: We gain homeowners fix-it how to knowledge and some biceps/triceps/a more toned physique.  Cons: It get's done in two times the amount of time because it is usually Ed and I and 2 or 3 other people - not a truck load like Tom would have.  Am I complaining?? Heck no!  Bring on the challenge!  

This weekend brought about some surprises and discoveries and awesomeness by siblings!  (I love the word awesome; it's such an all encompassing word.)  First off, THANK YOU Will, Mandy and Adam! Will came down to help Ed with the electric - considering he's a badass pro - and Mandy and I, well, we lift things up and put them down.  Remember the basement/rec room with the fireplace and icky floors? 

We destroyed them.  Mandy and I took up those floors with ease and neatly piled those cat-pee-smellin (oh it's AWFUL!) wannabe fake wood boards in a hot mess of a pile in the garage.  Underneath the faux(pas) flooring was more flooring which looked original.  I was able to take these tiles up carefully and with ease, but they left a black not-so-sticky-anymore adhesive which, according to Google, is called Mastic or Cutback adhesive and *could* contain asbestos.  Before you freak out, take a deep breath.  The tiles removed came up like glass creating minimal to no dust/particle fibers in the air and the mastic will be removed with Bean-e-Doo, a environmentally friendly (and lung no-harsh-make-you-pass-out-from-fumes friendly) soybean adhesive remover that when done working its little bean magic, will turn the mastic into a motor oil type substance that can be scooped up and cleaned up with kitty litter.  How cool is that?!  Keeps all potentially harmful fibers out of the air and is tree-hugger friendly!  My mother-in-law would be proud! 

Ed took care of a lot of plumbing in the bathroom and we scored an almost new deck/patio set for our favorite price: F-to-the-R-to-the-double-EE!  If not for Adam and his work van, we would have lost out - Thank You, Adam!

We also discovered something in the front yard that Ed and I are stoked about!  Ready?  We have fruit trees!!  Yes plural; as in multiple different varieties of fruit growing in our front yard.  We have an apple tree, a pear tree, a peach tree, and a raspberry bush.  We also discovered we have mint growing in the front too, which my dad scowls at; I smile and say 'fresh mojito's, anyone?'.

3 Days, 60 Miles, and A Million Blisters.

A non-house related post that touches everyones life and heart.  Just about 11 years ago I lost someone very, very dear to me; that day changed my life forever.  Just about 5 years earlier, I had lost someone very, very dear as well; that day too changed lives forever.  In my life now, I am graced with knowing survivors of multiple ages. 

11 years ago I lost my mother to Breast Cancer.  My father lost his soul mate of 25+ years;  my sister and brother their mother; my son his grandmother; friends their rock; and the world a special light of never ending kindness and joy.  She fought a long, courageous, difficult battle that involved remissions and bone marrow transplants and one too many hospital stays.  

16 years ago the world lost another amazing soul far too soon; her name, Karen Shebanie.  A husband lost his wife of 25 years; two daughters lost a mother; I lost my second mother; my mother lost her best friend; my best friend lost her mother.  Breast Cancer took her away from us, too.  She fought a courageous battle with gusto and will stronger than I've ever seen.  

6 years ago I learned that my amazing Mother-in-Law is a 20+ (almost 30) year Breast Cancer survivor.  She fought this disease while raising three little kids.  My cousin, a multiple diagnosis cancer survivor (including Ovarian and Breast) at the young age of early 40's.  These women whom are near and dear to my heart have stared death and cancer in the face and told them "not today, not tomorrow, not ever will you take my life."

These women are the women I admire and look to for strength.  Not celebrities or sports gods, no.  Real people fighting a real disease and a fight that could cost them their life.  I admire my mother for gracefully enduring the pain and suffering she did without complaint and how she always had a smile while doing it, even if it was killing her.  I admire Karens strength and humor and dedication to her girls and students even though she was in insufferable pain - she too never left a day without a smile.  I admire my Mother-in-Law for her victories and perseverance and I'm lucky to have her and I cherish every day, she's a tough cookie and an amazing women. 

So, why the tearful, gut-wrenching, tugging on your heart strings, post?  Katie Butler and I are taking on the challenge of the 3-Day Susan G. Komen walk for the cure. Our team is Baby Got Rack and it's a 3 Day walk, 60 miles being held in Boston in July (22-24). Why are we doing this?  We are doing this because this, to us, is helping to save lives.  This is a cause that hits home and if we can be a part of something that will prevent another little girl from loosing their mom or grandma too soon, then we want to do that.  We are walking to honor our Mothers.  We are walking to celebrate my Mother-in-Law and cousin and their victories.  We are walking in hopes that one day we won't have to walk any longer because a cure has been found.  So, if you're reading and have made it this far, thank you.  If anyone reading this would like to donate to our fundraising goal of $4600., please click the link below.  If you have already donated, Katie and I greatly appreciate your help and so do countless amounts of mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, cousins, aunts, and next door neighbors.  Love you all. 

Click here for the 3-Day Donation Page to Baby Got Rack.

Decisions For Dummies.

I am not one to easily make decisions without mulling it over and over and over again.  Once I make a decision, I go back to mulling over that decision making sure I made the right choice; reassembling this house has been no different.  You see, Ed loves the mechanical and technical aspects of gutting a home.  Me, I love putting it back together piece by beautiful piece.  But, of course, piecing the house back together requires decisions - some of which have been made, others not so much.  We pretty much have the bathroom squared away decision wise in terms of color, tile, sinks, faucets, sconces, etc.  The colors for the house are narrowed down and they're beautiful (well, we think so at least).  Connor, we found out, is quite good at making decisions.  His room will be a killer shade of green and one wall black.  Black you ask?!  What the hell kinda mother am I?  I bet you're thinking soon he'll be sporting a blue mohawk, start wearing eyeliner and painting his fingernails black.  Oh, you little sillies.  No, no, no.  The black wall in Cmans room will be chalkboard paint!  Isn't that the coolest thing ever?  Cman thinks so and so do we.

However, the kitchen is whole other story.  We have a general idea of where we're going with it, but Ed and I cannot decide (woah! no way) on lighting.  Well, we know we want recessed lighting, but over the sink we can't put a pot there, so we have to get a pendant light.  The only thing is this, we have a eat-in-kitchen-bar-extended-counter-thing that had two pendant lamps over it - uneven lamps, but lamps.  Because the dining room is so close to the kitchen (the open flooooow baby) and we have an incredible chandelier in mind, we're worried all the lights will be too many in too confined an area.

So, what do you think?  Recessed over the eat-in counter and just one lamp over the sink? Or two small pendant lamps over the eat-in counter to match the one over the sink and just hope it doesn't look cluttered or competitive with the future chandelier?  Just when I think I've decided and Ed gives the ok, I'm back to Googleing images to help me...make a decision (for dummies).